Yes, marriage counselling can truly save a struggling relationship, provided both partners are willing to participate honestly, take responsibility for their actions, and commit to the process of healing. While every relationship is unique, counselling offers couples a structured, supportive environment to address problems that may otherwise spiral into separation or divorce. It is not a magical cure, but when approached with sincerity, it can be the turning point that transforms conflict into connection.
Understanding What Marriage Counselling Is
Marriage counselling — also called couples therapy — is a specialized form of psychotherapy designed to help couples:
- Understand the root causes of conflict
- Improve communication patterns
- Resolve emotional wounds from past events
- Rebuild intimacy, trust, and empathy
- Set healthy boundaries and shared goals
It is typically conducted by a trained psychologist, marriage therapist, or clinical counsellor using evidence-based therapeutic models such as:
- Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)
- The Gottman Method
- Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) for couples
- Psychodynamic Couples Therapy
How Marriage Counselling Helps Save Relationships
1. Identifies Underlying Issues
Many couples fight over surface-level issues like money, chores, or parenting, without realizing the deeper emotional needs behind them — such as a need for validation, security, or autonomy. Counselling brings these subconscious patterns to light.
2. Teaches Healthy Communication
One of the most common reasons relationships deteriorate is poor communication. Counselling helps couples:
- Express their needs without blame
- Listen with empathy instead of defensiveness
- Avoid toxic patterns like yelling, stonewalling, or passive-aggressiveness
3. Rebuilds Emotional Connection
In struggling relationships, emotional intimacy often fades. Therapy creates space for vulnerability, allowing partners to reconnect, understand each other’s fears, and heal past emotional wounds.
4. Provides a Neutral and Safe Space
Many couples fail to resolve conflicts at home due to emotional intensity. A trained therapist offers an impartial environment where both partners can speak freely without fear of judgment or escalation.
5. Sets Goals and Accountability
Marriage counselling helps couples set relationship goals and track progress. This could include rebuilding trust after infidelity, improving sexual intimacy, or navigating parenting conflicts. The therapist ensures both partners stay accountable to their commitments.
6. Builds Individual Self-Awareness
Sometimes the problem is not “us” but what each person brings into the relationship — unresolved trauma, attachment issues, or personality clashes. Counselling helps individuals gain insight into their own emotional behavior and its impact on the relationship.
Does Marriage Counselling Always Work?
Not always. Counselling is most effective when both partners are:
- Open to change
- Willing to admit mistakes
- Patient with the process
- Emotionally invested in saving the marriage
Counselling is less likely to work when:
- One partner is completely disengaged or unwilling to participate
- There is ongoing abuse, addiction, or infidelity without accountability
- One or both partners are already emotionally detached or seeking separation
However, even in such cases, therapy can help provide clarity and closure, guiding couples to make respectful decisions about their future.
Legal Angle: How Counselling Is Recognized in Indian Matrimonial Law
In India, family courts acknowledge the role of counselling in matrimonial disputes. Under the Family Courts Act, 1984, courts are empowered to refer cases to counsellors for attempts at reconciliation before granting divorce.
Section 9 of the Family Courts Act encourages counselling and conciliation as a preliminary step in matrimonial cases. This shows the judiciary’s preference to save the marriage wherever possible, especially when children are involved.
Also, under Section 23(2) of the Hindu Marriage Act, 1955, before granting a decree of divorce, the court must ensure that all efforts for reconciliation (like counselling or mediation) have been made.
When Should Couples Consider Marriage Counselling?
- When communication has become toxic or non-existent
- When emotional or physical intimacy has faded
- After infidelity or breach of trust
- When one or both partners feel unfulfilled, frustrated, or disconnected
- When disagreements over children, finances, or family become frequent
- If separation or divorce is being considered but not yet certain
It is best not to wait until the breaking point. The earlier you seek help, the higher the chance of saving the relationship.
Duration and Frequency of Marriage Counselling
The length of therapy depends on the couple’s issues and goals. Typically:
- Short-term therapy: 6 to 12 sessions
- Long-term therapy: 3 months to a year or more for deeper issues
Sessions are usually held once a week, lasting 60 to 90 minutes. Therapists may also assign tasks or exercises to practice at home.
Does Counselling Guarantee That a Marriage Will Be Saved?
No professional therapist will guarantee results. Counselling provides the tools, space, and support for healing — but the success depends on the couple’s willingness to use those tools consistently.
However, even if reconciliation does not happen, counselling ensures that decisions about separation or divorce are made thoughtfully, with emotional maturity, and often in a less combative way — especially important when children are involved.
Conclusion
To answer directly: Yes, marriage counselling can absolutely save a struggling relationship, provided there is willingness, honesty, and effort from both partners. It empowers couples to break harmful patterns, heal emotional wounds, and build a more conscious and connected partnership. For many, it becomes the single most transformative step they take — not just to save the marriage, but to rediscover each other as partners.
Disclaimer: This information is intended for general guidance only and does not constitute legal advice. Please consult with a qualified lawyer for personalized advice specific to your situation.
Advocate J.S. Rohilla (Civil & Criminal Lawyer in Indore)
Contact: 88271 22304